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Saturday, September 20th, 2008
5:21 pm - sick and tired of being sick and tired
I'm so so so so so so so so SICK and TIRED of counting on people, even in the SMALLEST sense, and having the rug ripped out from under me. I hate that people can be so insensitve and not even have the common courtesy of a return phone call to NOT leave me high and dry. I was really excited about going somewhere last night and I let one friend off the hook, not knowing that the friend I had asked was going to say no, and not tell me that she was going to say no. She seemed excited about it....and then never returned my phone calls. So I asked my original friend to go with me, but she had already made plans. So I wasn't going to pull her away from something she wanted to do to something that she wasn't excited about in the first place. So, I counted on my friend to call me back and at least tell me that she didn't want to go. So I wouldn't be at least waiting all night. Did I get said phone call? No. Have I heard from said friend yet? Nope. I called another friend, and nearly cried, because I really, REALLY, wanted to go. I learned from her that there was a good reason why the friend I was waiting to hear back from didn't want to go, she didn't want to run into someone there..........That would have been REALLY nice to know when she was originially thinking about going with me. I can't stand muhc more of this. She won't call me back, she won't tell me the reason she didn't want to go. Hmm, selfish much? Meanwhile, I'm left sitting at home and wondering what in the hell I did wrong to make her NOT call me back, why she's punishing me. Now, after talking to my other friend, I know why she didn't want to go, but that would have been nice to know BEFORE. That's all I'm saying. I didn't want to go on my own because I wanted to have fun with some friends and go watch a great concert. But instead, I was angry and upset because she wouldn't answer my phone calls or call me back at all. Upset because I didn't know if something happened to her, or if I did something to piss her off. And angry because if she was okay, she wasn't calling me back and at least telling me that she didn't want to go. She didn't have to tell me her main reasons, but just telling me that she was going to stay at home would have been fine for me. And I swear, if I find out that she DID go, I'm done. I'm washing my hands of her. I don't care how it affects mine and another friends relationship. I CANNOT do this anymore. I've put up with selfish people before and as I get older, I'm tired of giving people more chances then they deserve. If I hear from her today, and she apologizes, then my anger will be gone. I'll forgive...not forget, but forgive. If not? I'm not sure. I won't be able to not be upset with her the next time I see her. And the next time I see her? I don't know. Probably around the time that Sam's birthday comes around in two weeks. I don't want to cause problems, but I'm not going to sit down and let this happen to me without standing up for myself.
batter up
Wednesday, August 27th, 2008
5:26 am
Lately,  I seem to make a muck of things every time I open my mouth. I'm taking a vow of silence, the only exceptions being when I'm at work and at school where I have to communicate verbally in order to perform my duties. But other then that, I think it's for the best right now if I don't open my mouth and spew forth the vile and discomforting thoughts/feelings/emotions that are mistrusting, angry, and conspiratorial. Until I can keep those in check, or deal with them like I thought I had, then I think it's for the best that I not open my mouth on the off chance that I could piss someone else off. Plus, I'm sure my surly attitude hasn't helped either. And here I thought that I was finally get out of this....fuck.
batter up
Monday, August 25th, 2008
4:53 pm - hypocrite
If you distance yourself from people, for the purpose of escaping drama, then once all the drama subsided (and you got your own issues in check) you have no resenment/problems with said people-are you a hypocrite for becoming upset when some friends of yours that are still friends with them are still hanging out with them? Only one person on your friends' side think that you still have a problem with the other group, so she's still trying (though wrongly) to keep the separation even after blatant attempts by you and other friend to convince her otherwise. Makes you think that the other group that was once avoided has something to do with this too? Maybe? Or maybe that's just the conspiracy theorist living inside of me peeking out again. Is it also hypocritical to have distanced yourself from that group and then try and get back in? Is the drama it could cause worth it? Should there even be any feelings for this at all? Why is there these feelings, like jealously and envy for something that was put on the back burner anyway?

...this probably doesn't make any sense at all. Just a random thought before I head to class tonight.  
batter up
Tuesday, August 19th, 2008
5:35 pm - magic
I still believe in....

Magic. Supernatural things, because I really don't think everything can be understood in scientific concrete terms.

I still wish for....

Love. Someone that'll set me on my heels, someone I can share an unconditional love with.

I still believe in....

Fairy tales. Combining magic and the unconditional love,.

I wish for....

Hope and Guidance. I know that not everyone can get their fairy tales, but I refuse to believe that magic in love doesn't exist. It takes hard work and a lot of luck, but I won't lose hope that with the right guidance, my fairy tales and magic will come together. =)

batter up
Friday, July 4th, 2008
8:11 am - my 4th of july...
is not going so great right now. Its okay, but nothing to write home about. See I'm one of the multitude of people stuck working this joyous celebration of America's birth. Granted, I do get off at 11 rather then my normal 1:30, but still, I'm here anyway. 

I was thinking about how weird it is, that on any normal weekday, I struggle to get up, get dressed, and get to work on time. But today, I had no problems. I think that was so because 1) I knew I was going to get to go home early 2) There was only going to be a fraction of the amount of people coming in and 3) I could use the extra money it'll bring in. But it's not like I'm getting paid time and half or anything. No siree. Not at Baylor, who doesn't recognize most federal holidays, I should know, I was the one that worked on Easter.

But I'm not complaining, because I know that there are people like me right now, stuck at work because they either had no choice in the matter or they voulnteered because they had nothing better to do. I fall into the latter categoy. I was supposed to go to the lake today with my Dad and stepmom, but my Dad asked me to bow out so he and Diana could spend the weekend together. I understood, it's cool, but since most of my friends are either going out of town or are already out of town, this leaves me with limited options.

I figured not a lot of people would be going out of town this weekend, but I guess I was wrong. I've heard from my traveling friends that traffic wasn't that bad since gas prices have been keeping people at home lately. That's the good thing about staying in town this weekend for me, I guess. I don't have to put my ancient car through a trip I'm not even sure that it can handle anymore. I love my car, but I don't think '01 Kia's were supposed to last over 135K miles. I took it into the shop the other day and the guy came back with a laundry list full of stuff that I should at least think about getting. Could be that the shop needs to make their monthly quota, or that my car really needs it. Who knows, I don't know anything about cars. For all I know, my car could be hanging on by a thread or the car guy could be just trying to take my money. One of those things with life I think...all the honest mechanics charge too much and the cheap guys aren't honest enough to tell you the truth about your car. C'est la vie, no?

My manager came in today, which we didn't really think that he would. I'm playing with fire even typing this, but I had to do something. I finished the crossword puzzle (by myself and with only minimal internet help) which I shouldn't have been doing anyway. But we've been open for three and half hours now and only 81 people have come in. We usually average that an hour. Ugh....

Someone just came up to me, really nice lady, not going to lie, but she (like some people) assume a lot of things whenever they see the cross around my neck. She asked me if I was a Christian and I replied, "No, Catholic. Irish/German". I wear, and love my cross, because it's an ancient Irish symbol, but it holds no real religious- I didn't get into this with her, just told her I was Catholic. She then handed me a bookmark that "puts Jesus in the holiday" and bid me a good day. Nice lady. It was just too hard to explain the whole spiritual-but-not-really-into-the-"Jesus is King"-thing. She asked me what church I went to here and told her that I was non-practicing. Or as Sam likes to taunt a "fake Catholic". 

See, I REALLY disagree with that sentiment. Fake implies that I go to church, actively participate in church events and then completely disregard them within my moral fiber. Uh, no, not really. Non-practicing implies that while I don't go to church, and I'm not active within the community or whatnot, in my heart I'm still practicing the morals and lessons that I learned within that church. I don't think it should matter whether I go to church or not. There are quite a few people who I know go to church and they are completely self-centered and backwards from any church teachings that they might have encountered. Or they could just choose to ignore what they want, when they want, and use the church to suit their means whenever they can. 

See, that's why I can't stand most organized religious institutions. Manipulation of faith and perversion of God have totally turned me off from pretty much all church. I'll still go to a Catholic ceremony every once in a while, but for the most part, I stay clear of church. I don't believe that I need some squeaky clean pastor telling me that I'm going to hell for not swalloing the "fact" that Jesus was God's only son and if I don't accept him into my heart then I'm not welcome in God's heaven. 

Uh, yeah, no. Don't think so. The God that I believe in, doesn't care what faith you belong to...I'm going to step in so many land mines if I try and argue with myself right here, so I'll just end this rant right now. I try not to get on the topic of religion very often. My thoughts and ideas come from all types of religions. I take what makes most sense to me and I try and just live my life. I don't "save" people, nor do I tell them that their religion is full of shit, or baby-killers or freaks or whathave you. Everyone's entilted to finding their own path, and I'll be damned if someone is going to take me away from my own. 

Whoa, okay. Didn't know that rant was going to come out of nowhere. Better watch myself around here, some people will want to get into a debate and I'm not feeling very feisty today. Well, I do feel feisty, but not too much to debate with someone about faith and religion. Save that for when I'm not working on a holiday...
batter up
Thursday, June 26th, 2008
11:59 am - i blame kathryn...
for making me like paranormal novels. Mostly from the pens of J.R. Ward and some others that I can't remember at this point in time. Rachelle Meade comes to mind as well. And now I have slipped into the the new "popular" series called The "Twilight" series. Written by Stephenie Meyer, the series is more geared towards teens and young adults (does 23 still count as a young adult? I'd like to think so =D) but it's still a pretty good read. I must say though that I have become a bit obsessive about it. I find myself liking the series a bit too much, so much so that while reading the newest installment Eclipse, that during one part I threw the book down in frustration and only hours later did I feel calm enough to pick it back up again. 

I've always had a strong reaction to books. Especially ones that are in a series. Seeing numerous characters again, and feeling what your favorite characters in the story are feeling always make me feel like the author has done their job in making me believe in this scenario they have laid out within the pages. This particular reaction I had was so strong that I wanted to examine why I had such a reaction. For those that are waiting to read the books, or haven't read them all, you might want to skip this part because I'm about to give spoilers...done, okay skip down and continue. 

So the part that made me throw down the book in frustration was when the main character realized that she was in love with her best friend (a werewolf). Granted, she was pretty much already committed to marrying her boyfriend (a vampire), but she had found her soul mates in two different people, one for the "human world" and the other for the "vampire world" that she would have to join in order to stay with her vampire beau. When the heroine realizes she loves the more human of the two, she sees their entire future together. Knowing that she would be happy and loved and knowing that she would love him as much as he loved her, she still couldn't leave the vamp. 

This frustrates me mostly because (in the context of the world Meyer has created) the heroine would have to become a vampire in order to stay with the vamp, and that means that for the first several years after she changes, she'll be a blood-thirsty savage who might not be the same person anymore. I think the hardest part for me to grasp is why she would go through with this, becoming someone else entirely, changing practically her entire being for someone when the other guy is not asking her to do anything like that at all. 

Maybe because it's that I've never met someone I would give up my entire life for, but the fact that she chose that one over the other just makes me feel frustrated. I think it's been too ingrained in me since I was younger that I don't need to change. I guess since essentially it was her choice, it shouldn't really matter what I think, but it still bothers me.  Maybe it's the fact that the hopeless romantic in me is finally keeling over and dying that is making me feel this way. I just don't see how someone would want to give up not only their life but their human experiences, in essence their humanity. I know, I know, it's just a book, but it kind of erks me at the end of the book, when Meyer is talking about the wedding fixing to happen between human and vamp, there are little iron on t-shirt decals at the end of the book--one for each guy.

WHAT in tarnation?!

 To me, her choosing the vampire over the werewolf, and then choosing to basically give up her life pretty much sealed the deal that they were going to get married. And then finding those things in the back....more frustration. I'm totally on the best friends side. I'm pretty much all on his team. I think I need to read the books again when I'm not feeling so negative about love though. I think that might help. I know love exists in all different kinda ways, but I guess I have never personally experienced anything that would make me want to give up everything for that one person. I'm not going to be settling for anyone less then I deserve, but I still don't know what's going to happen when I finally meet the one guy that makes my hair stand on end. I can't wait for that day, but until then I'm a bit cynical. Maybe the hopeless romantic in me is not dead completely, but only taking a sleep for a bit...

I'm sure none of this makes any sense at all. People that haven't read the book probably have no idea what the hell I am talking about, so I'm not sure where my train of thought was going. It was actually going to go on an entirely different tangent, but then I started this blog before I had finished the book. Before I had realized it was going to turn that way. I had been aware that there would be a love triangle, so I was waiting for over four hundred pages of this last book for there to actually be a love triangle. I have no idea what's going to happen with the last and final book in the series, but after reading her website and really reading some of the things she's said, I know that the fourth and final book will end with her choosing the vampire and then she'll start another series starring the werewolf. It's going to frustrate me to no end, I know this...and yet I'll still keep reading. Because that's the allure of a great author. She keeps us coming back for more. Frustrated still. But I think maybe reading the books again, slower this time, and more thoroughly will help me understand why she made the choices she did. 

I'm a freak I know it. But these are the thoughts that have been leaving me thinking for a few days. So yeah, that's about it. My thoughts for the moment. Sporadic and non-sencical. But that's just me.
batter up
Sunday, June 1st, 2008
7:53 pm - haha
I found out that I can get to this from work, ha-ha-ha!

Not much going on. Finally got full-time at Baylor, only took me begging and pleading for a year before it came to be. Plus, I'm also going to continue with my after-school care teaching at the private school. Which is a really good thing considering Carlos and I found a GREAT apartment that's just a BIT out of the way from work, so gas will go up. But hopefully by the time I move in, I'll have a job that's a bit closer to where I will be living.

So our new place is mondo-fabulous! It was th 10th place that we had looked at that day, and it wasn't even on our list. We were driving by from another place, saw it, stopped by and loved it. We filled out the application and now we're just making sure that those go through before we can officially call it ours. =)

Other then that, not much else hs been going on. I'm just trying to make it through the long days right now. It helps that I have two weeks off from the school. Getting off from Baylor at 1:30pm is really helping with the tired factor and all that. But I know that the money that I get from both the school and Baylor will be much appreciated once I start working both again. I'll just have to tough it out and enjoy the days I have off.

Nothing on the dating front. There was a guy I was interested in, but it never really moved out of the work setting and then he left, so I'm almost positive nothing's coming of that...And there was another one, but he's still hung up on someone from 3 years ago, so again, nada. Which is just as well I guess, there was way too much drama associated with that group of guys anyway. We're all friends and that's the way it's going to stay.

I completed a full year of my graduate degree. I got a 4.0 this semester (*happy irish jig!!!*) making my total GPA around a 3.5 since I got all B's last semester. Oh well. I'm shooting for a Dec. '09 graduation date, so mark your calendar's oh-faithful reader's! 

 Nothing much else going on. Just working, jiving, and trying to keep myself movin' and groovin'. Y'all have a nice one.
batter up
Friday, December 28th, 2007
8:07 pm - break time at work, so here we go....

Hey y'all, been a slow day today at work, so on my break I'm stealing this from Heidi....

batter up
Sunday, November 18th, 2007
8:19 pm - just waiting til work is done
I'm kinda in a weird mood right now. I honestly only have a week until I have two HUGE papers due for my classes (one next Monday and the other on Tuesday) and you know what I have done? Not a lot. I can't even lie on this.

I've done a fair amount of research, printed out articles, read some books, taken notes and I have set aside long amounts of time to dedicate to writing. And I don't really have anything. At all.

Most of this comes from the fact that I didn't really want to take one of the classes. All grad students in A&H have to take a course called Historiography. And yes it is as boring as it sounds. The professor for the class is a great guy, he actually cares whether or not we read and what we think of the material. But, for me, I just don't like the subject matter. I like writing regular history papers and not ones where I have to analyze source material, arguments, etc. A lot of this class has incorporated philosophy and I can't stand that. I'm sorry. If that makes me a bad grad student, then so be it. 

The other class I am taking: Magic, Sciene, Religion in Early Modern Europe (MSR as I called it) was really interesting, but since our papers could be whatever we wanted in the realm of magic (which can inclue the other two but doesn't have too) it was really hard to get me motivated to read the books. Some of the books I'll be keeping because their subecjt matter was interesting, but for the most part I didn't feel as if reading was a necessity. Again, the professor for this class is amazing and knowledgable. And I don't think that I'm going to have a problem writing the paper, but getting it started is proving difficult.

The Historiography paper has been the assignment that has been lurking in my mind for most of the semester. I've tried my hardest to understand what exactly my professor wants, but when I went to meet with him and gave him my outline, he said that I needed to remain focused on the distinction between a history paper and a historiography paper. Which basically the main difference is that with the former you analyze the event or the person or whatnot, with the latter, you analyze what the author wrote and not really about the event/person/place itself.

I don't know what to do. But I know for a fact that I'm unavoidably going towards something that I had hoped not to fall into during grad school: killing myself to finish an assignment. Meaning that I will be pulling all-nighters and rushing to get done by the turn in date. I had planned on finishing the majority of the work before I left for Angelo, and that still might happen. I'm going to try my hardest to make that happen. But if I don't, then I'll just have to pull a few all-nighters and then get my ass in gear. I want to say that I won't do this again next semester, since I still have two jobs and I'll be adding another class on top of that. But I know myself too much to make that promise. All I can do is try my hardest and do what I can. Even if that means dropping a class or finding another job. Life is so hectic right now, but I wouldn't have it any other way.
batter up
Wednesday, October 31st, 2007
1:49 am - criz-ap
I jinxed myself....dadgumit.

gotta keep on truckin'  
batter up
Tuesday, October 23rd, 2007
11:35 am - been awhile
Certainly been quite some time hasn't it? 

I'm not sure of what to type, just because so many things have gone on in my life and I don't know where to begin. So let's start with some basics.

-I am now in graduate school at UTD. Not the place I wanted to end up, but I still get to see my friends and see my Dad weekly, so I'm good with that.
-Working two different jobs. Still working at Baylor (please hold your groans) and also now working at a private school as an after-care provider. Basically I'm a baby-sitter until the kid's parents come and get them after work.
-I joined match.com...and I'm talking to a guy on there. We'll see what happens. Nothing is set in stone, we have a lot in common and I'm probably jinxing the hell outta myself by writing this out but yeah. Not sure what's going to happen, I'm not writing anything as for sure.
-I haven't talked to Xanax (via text or phone) since May and if I hadn't randomly asked him a question over facebook we wouldn't have had any contact at all. His choice not mine.
-Courtney and I are no longer...actively friends. Does that make sense? When we see each other we're friendly and all that, but we do not seek each other out to hang out anymore. Her choice just as much as mine. A lot of bad shit went down about at the beginning of September involving someone else (most of which I don't remember because I was rip-roaring drunk). Needless to say, I lost one of my best friends over a stupid asshole.
-I moved into a new apartment by myself. Which is nice but the neighborhood kinda scares me sometimes.
-I'm still not over a certain asshole. NOT the above mentioned one-that ship sailed LONG ago.
-I HATE that I'm not over this thing whatever the hell it is, but a part of me feels like there is something left...that could just be my stupidity but whatever.
-I can't travel as much as I want too. I miss everyone in Angelo and Austin that I used to be able to see more often.
-I'm going to be Beth from Dog the Bounty Hunter for Halloween.
-Grad school is definitely not as easy as some people make it look. BTW, I HATE philosophy.
-I'm worried...a lot.
-Currently looking for another job, but not getting my hopes up.
-I can honestly say that my insomnia has calmed down. I think that may be because I don't have time to be tired anymore. Any sleep that I can get my body terribly needs.
-Reading for class is still as hard as it was for undergrad, but this time I actually HAVE to get it done.

That's about it...I'm tired a lot, but as soon as November is done I'm done until next semester, so then I'll have time to do other things. Like relax...and not have to worry about not understanding certain readings for class...going to class unprepared because I couldn't get through the reading...basic stuff like that. I think that Mel, Kevin, Dario, Erin, and I are going to try and get outta town for part of December. That would be really nice. =)

So yeah.....nothing else. My creative side has been blocked too. I haven't been able to write anything new since July. plus it probably doesn't help that I'm trying to completely re-write one of my stories, so there's a major headache in itself.

And now I'm done. Today's my long day. I've been at work since 5:00am til 1:00pm (at the Richardson site not Baylor) and then I get about an hour and half break before I head to the my 2nd job for the day from 3-5:30 and then fighting traffic to get to campus for class at 7. Then volleyball tonight at 9:45. Oy...
3 homeruns| batter up
Sunday, April 15th, 2007
5:26 pm - random thingie
i saw this on myspace the other day and i just really liked it... :)

this is meCollapse )
batter up
Friday, March 23rd, 2007
5:26 pm
i didn't get in.....

l'awjn'gjoawr gk;jnrvlofop'WINVLASK DVKLsD VOsN0[QEFqkef
1 homerun| batter up
Thursday, March 8th, 2007
11:55 pm - bored stole from heidi...
back in san to the angelo for spring break and i went to scrub pub with cortney and a few of her friends...not too bad. they had 25 cent drink specials...it was awesome, so i'm bored at home now and putting off going to bed so that i can deliver this awesome thing...


1. Who was your best friend?

2. What sports did you play?
Softball, varsity starting pitcher, oh yeah! and i did ultimate frisbee a few times, that was fun :)

3. What kind of car did you drive?
pimping out that Kia

4. It's Friday night, where were you at?
with ashley, megan, cassie, jen, or any miz therein

5. Were you a party animal?
Not really, I saved all that for college :)

6. Were you a considered a flirt?
not really

7. Ever skip school?
i did once so that i could attend my best friend's wedding and of course for senior skip day :)

8. Were you a nerd?
in my own way i was a nerd but in a typical nerdy way

9. Were you suspended/expelled?
nope, only a general detention once or twice and that was it

10. Can you sing the fight song?
i know that central had one but i really can't remember it, at all

11. Who was your favorite teacher?
my pre-cal teacher (Mrs. Wheat??), my physics teacher (Mr. Kalig) and my creative writing teacher (Mrs. King)

12. Favorite class?
i liked 'em all, except for Web page design....*shudders*

13. What was your school's full name?
San Angelo Central High School

14. School mascot?
Bobcat's, sic 'em!

15. Did you go to Prom?

16. If you could go back and do it over, would you?
some aspects of it, i think that i would try and get into a different school for softball, but i can't say that i wouldn't want to be at utd because i've met some of the best people in the world here :)

17. What do you remember most about graduation?
it was hot, it was threatening rain and i think that the dude sitting in front of me was half drunk...

18. Favorite memory of your Senior Year?
oh gosh...i have way too many to just have one...new uniforms in softball, driving around with friends, classes with friends, it just keeps on going...

19. Were you ever posted up on the senior wall?

20. Did you have a job your senior year?
nope, i wanted to focus on school and softball my last year to get into a good college and all that

21. Where did you go most often for lunch?
home, seniors and juniors could go off campus for lunch at 1:15, and i didn't have softball until 2:15 so i would go home, chill and then head to softball-sometimes i went out, going to free lunch or grabbing some take out but for the most part i went home

22. Have you gained weight since then?
not a lot, i lost some muscle in some places but gained it some others, it's weird...

23. What did you do after graduation?
florida with meg, found out i got into utd, packed away my life and sold everything else, helped my mom move into a rent house with my aunt, and then moved myself to dallas to live with my dad

24. When did you graduate?
May of 2003

25. Where are most of your classmates?
Angelo State, some at UT, some at A&M, one at BYU, some at Tech, St. Ed's, we all kinda scattered

26. Ten year reunion - you going?
Hell freakin yeah! And i plan on looking absolutely fabulous :)
batter up
Sunday, February 18th, 2007
12:56 am - ink
i got new ink...it looks amazing :) that is all
batter up
Thursday, February 8th, 2007
1:49 pm
Simple pleasure #6

Going to the cologne aisle at any store and sniffing the cologne there. When picking out a good cologne I find that I like to imagine my face against a male neck and then sniffing a cologne. If I can vividly picture this, then it's a keeper. =) Especially if it's easy to picture said boy...rugged cowboy just coming in from work, honey-bun just coming home from work, or just seeing him after almost 9 months...and while getting hugged you inhale and smell one of your favorite smells, him plus his cologne. Okay, so maybe that's two simple pleasures in one....

so simple pleasure 6 and 6.5.

1 homerun| batter up
Wednesday, February 7th, 2007
12:43 am - been awhile
so...been awhile...miss me?

it's my last semester!! *happy irish jig*

i'm waiting on pins and needles to see if i got into UT or not...

meg's coming this weekend, yay!

i jammed my finger at my basketball game today, ugh.

i soooo wanna go to miami for spring break.

my birthday was sweet, thanks errbody for the good wishes =)

it's actually snowed here a couple of times this winter, sign of the apocalyspe? maybe.

our 3rd hamster, cherokee, passed away this week. we have officially decided that our apartment is cursed for hamsters so we will NOT be getting another one. 

have a new favorite song-"I miss you with me" by Randy Rogers Band...it's a great song with a soft melody that I heart.

i miss being able to play my guitar...damn me and my inability to tune it :-/

and i think that's it y'all...leave some love...i miss y'all...chris, heidi, bunny, dizdar, kev-o, and the numerous others that have stalked me through here. bed time for me, hasta luego all

current mood: hurting
batter up
Sunday, December 3rd, 2006
4:30 am - so....
So...my finals are fineto. That's neato. I'm so happy now that I don't have to worry about classes and homework for a whole month. But only bad thing about break is that I am going to be studying my ass off for the GRE.

I got three recommendations so that I can hopefully get into UT next year. I'm excited to be applying and I hope that I can find somewhere that I can take the GRE cause the few things that I have found and the only test day that I could find was today (Saturday) and I'm PRAYING that I can find another one too take so that I can have a prayer for getting into my dream school.

Finals went...well. I think that I bombed my Spanish final though. My professor should have never been teaching that class but whatever. Native American final went well I think. I might have been trying to hard to impress my professor (he is writing one of my recommendations) so I might have written too much or not been coherent in my essay by explaining too much. Oh well, I tried.

Working a lot more starting this week. At least an extra three or four hours a week. Trying to get some more money for Christmas and filling in for someone who isn't working anymore until the new chick is ready to handle working a Monday on her own without someone there to help. I'm just glad that they finally hired someone else. Next semester I'm going to be losing some money because I won't be working as much. But that's probably a good thing. I need more time for school then I had this semester.

In the past two months both of my parents have been diagnosed with a certain type of cancer. My mom had precancerous ovarian cancer and my Dad had skin cancer. I don't like talking a lot about this but the wonderful thing is that they both had surgery and they are both now cancer free. At least everything was removed that was considered cancerous. I'm very thankful for my parents and their health.

I guess that's it. Not really much else going on. I'm just trying to enjoy my time off, reading for fun, cracking the GRE book, spending more time with the family and friends, and enjoying the simple pleasures in life. I miss the smaller things that make me smile all the time. I find them randomly and they make my day. For instance, while I was home in Angelo, I found a CD in my car that I hadn't listened to in about a year. And it was awesome putting it in and hearing some old favorite songs and knowing all the words :) ....yay for simple pleasures :)

current mood: cold
batter up
Saturday, November 25th, 2006
1:43 am - found this in my e-mail...
...and wanted to put it on here cause i really liked it :)

"Ama me fideliter! Fidem meam noto: De corde totaliter Et ex mente tota, Sum presentialiter Absens in remota." -Anonymous

"Love me faithfully!/See how I am faithful:/With all my heart/And all my soul/I am with you/Though I am far away." -Anonymous

at the time, like about oh--last January or so--this fit good. anyway, i found it and i liked it and just thought that i should share.

current mood: nostalgic
batter up
Saturday, November 11th, 2006
7:21 pm
Random thought of the day:

I'm glad that when I was younger, my mother made me clean the house. Cause now I know what I need to clean whenever I do clean. I did that pretty much all day today. My room, bathroom, hallway, dining room/kitchen and the living room. Now for a much needed break...going to see Stranger then Fiction at Studio Movie Grill with the roommate and then hopefully going out and playing some pool and drinking some beers. :) Today was a great day off of work.

current mood: accomplished
batter up
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